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Dear Dishwasher,
About 3 weeks ago, I met a guy...He told my friends that he really likes
me, thought I was beautiful...the whole nine yards...After years of pursuing
men...one was FINALLY pursuing ME!! For the first 4 days, he called me 3
times a day, e-mailed me, the whole ball of wax...came to visit me where I
worked etc.
He then came to my home, and didn’t try to kiss me or anything...as he
was getting ready to leave, I asked him how he felt about me.... Yeah, I’m
beating myself up about this, and have been since about 2 seconds after I
asked the question...
He said he had been hurt and wanted to take it slow and try a new
approach by getting to know me first...then he kissed me...He got called
into work, and I told him before he left that taking it slow was fine with
me because I had too been hurt in the past...he then said he would call me
later...well he didn’t...so the next day I sent him an e-mail, apologizing
for being so forward and reiterating what I had said about taking it
slow...but my feeling is…how long does it take to call and say HI? Or send
e-mail? At this point I am very disappointed. I thought I had the potential
for something...I really don’t think what I said was all that bad...I am a
direct person by nature, and if someone had said to me what I said to him, I
would just perceive it as them wanting to be "clued in". I want to
know if I blew it...
Dear, Dear Darlene,
Relax...you might have saved yourself from the worst relationship
nightmare of your life. If it can be broken, break it now rather than later.
If being spontaneous and natural causes someone else to dislike you in the
beginning then you'd rather know that now than later. When you attract that
right connection while totally being yourself the chances of good
relationship are so much better. Being yourself means being inappropriate
sometimes, saying the wrong thing out of nervousness, making mistakes...this
is life in it's most natural state...so maybe you were too fast.... so
what...relax.
Guys are attracted to women who are natural, confident and strong.
The secret is an inner peace and self- acceptance that radiates outward
in the form of spontaneity and patience. If you're too eager… want
something real bad, it communicates insecurity and need. Be yourself. Work
on that instead of pursuing men, and they will invariably pursue you.
If he's calling you again...play hard to get (theatre is a great teacher)
if not...you truly didn't need him.
Pursue friendships not lovers....
Yours truly,
The dishwasher
"There
is a crack in everything...that's how the light gets in"
L. Cohen
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